Fractured Past (A Talnarin Novel Book 1) Page 3

  “Wait! It’s just me! It’s Alanna! Don’t throw anymore. Please. I’m back, I’m home.” Cautiously, I raise my head at the silence that greets me. I cringe at the faces of the small gathering of villagers thirty paces away. I understand the fear and confusion in their eyes, but the disgust prevalent on their faces is unexpected. I don’t understand. Why aren’t they happy to see me? Where are my parents? My sister? My brother? I open my mouth to ask but am cut short by the sudden clamor of voices all yelling at once.

  “Abomination!”

  “Why did you come back?”

  “Leave!”

  “What are you?”

  “Monster!”

  The villagers throw more rocks, and this time, they connect with my bruised and bloody skin. I hiss in pain and hunch over to try to protect my tender flesh. Silent tears tread down my battered face and sting my cuts. I don’t understand. What do they mean? Why are they doing this to me? I finally came home. Not knowing what else to do, I plead in hopes they will hear me over their screams. “I just wanted to come home. I know I shouldn’t have left and I’m sorry. I’ve learned my lesson. Please. Please don’t make me go. I can’t. They’ll kill me. I just want my parents. I just want my family.”

  Abruptly I’m grabbed in a fierce hug. Someone holds me from behind while the other grips me from my front. Startled, I struggle to free myself. I still the instant I hear their pained murmurs of assurance. My struggles cease and my body sags in their arms. Great heaving sobs wrench from my body as I grip them like a lifeline. I bury my head in my father’s chest as my mother strokes my hair.

  “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I love you. I’m sorry,” I cry.

  My mom shushes me while my dad rumbles out, “We’ve missed you so much. It’s okay now. We love you. You’re home, you’re safe now. You’re okay sweetheart. We’ve got you now. We love you. We will get you home. We’ll dress your wounds. We’ll feed you. You can bathe and relax. Gods, we’ve missed you. Don’t worry about the villagers. They’ll come around. Your mother and I will talk to the elders. There’s nothing for you to worry about now. You’re safe. No matter what happens, we have you. It’s okay.”

  We cling to each other for mere seconds before the crowd becomes too hard to ignore. I slowly raise my head from my dad’s shoulder and inhale a shaky breath. I will my tears to stop but still they fall. I grip my dad’s arm and mom’s hand like a lifeline and turn to face the mob. They said they would take care of the town. It’s going to be okay now. Everything will be fine.

  “It’s not her!”

  “It’s not possible!”

  “It’s monstrous!”

  “How could you!”

  “Go away!”

  The shouts and screams become louder, more frequent, and my parents start shouting back. Frightened, I cower behind my parents in hopes that this will all end soon. It’s too much. I just wanted to come home. I nearly jump out of my skin at the feel of arms wrapping around my stomach and shoulders. I yank at the hands and try to pull free in a panic.

  My mom turns at the motion and gently touches my cheek. “It’s just Anya and Andre. It’s okay, you’re okay. Calm down. Just breathe.” I turn my head and look up. Sure enough, Andre is towering over me with red misty eyes. I reach towards him with my now free hands but fall short. Unable to move any further due to the death grip around my waist. I gently pat Anya’s hands and speak softly.

  “Anya let go. Let go Anya. I need to turn. Anya.” I pause and wait for my release. After nothing happens I try a different approach. “Anya, I need to see you. Please.” Slowly the grip loosens and her arms fall away. I turn and peer down at my little sister and grip her in an equally tight hug despite the strain on my body. I raise my left arm and pull Andre to me. The three of us squeeze until we can’t breathe. I feel a hand grip my shoulder and another grip my arm. My parents. No more words are spoken, none are needed. First the first time since that night, I feel peace settle inside my bones once more. I pray to the Gods to never let this moment end. But I should have known it wouldn’t last.

  I touch my face and sure enough, my cheeks are wet from my tears. Praying was useless, I know that now. The Gods never lifted a finger to help me, never cared about the one small, insignificant human.

  They say that there are five Gods residing in sacred Valina. Nerio, the god of creation and life, is the most powerful of the five. He is founder and father of our world and our people. Nerio is impartial to the life he creates, preferring his siblings to oversee us all. How one can be impartial to beings he brings to life is strange to me, even if he is a God. They say He never interferes in the lives of those who creates, merely observes our paths in life.

  The other four siblings that remain are equal, having been ‘put in their place’ by the eldest and strongest. No one knows when they arrived on Bylir or when they established the hierarchy they abide by. These Gods have simply been around since our beginning, or so we’re told.

  The God of mercy and love is Freal. He’s a kind, compassionate, understanding, and forgiving being. Freal is responsible for the joys in life; he gave us the gift of compassion. Personally, what I find happiness with in this world is of my own doing. No God has a role in the feelings I have.

  The Goddess of trickery and misfortune is called Hedra. She has a penchant for revenge. Petty and unforgiving, she deals back ten-fold to those she deems unworthy. And those she does deem worthy? Well, they’re few are far between, or so say the stories. Hedra does have a more playful side, and enjoys a good laugh at the expense of others.

  Ramic is the God of death and pain and, as one might assume from his title alone, is terrifying. He is known as the harbinger of death and disease. That’s not to say Ramic enjoys slaughtering innocents and inflicting pain of the unsuspecting. He is also known to be somewhat soft hearted at times, and has taken pity on us humans before.

  Finally, there is Sonya, Goddess of wisdom and arts. They say she is the reason we have our own thoughts and desires. Sonya grants each individual human their own will and talents.

  So where were these magnificent, all powerful Gods when I was suffering? Where were they when my village was suffering? Where the fuck were they when my family was suffering? The memories of my family are the hardest ones to bare. I’d lose myself in those happy memories if I could; I just want to remember my family and wither away.

  But I can’t let myself do that. Not yet. I need to end Them first. After all, that’s why I ran in the first place. I need to get stronger. I don’t know what It is exactly or why I have it, but I need to control It. I need to harness It and I need to destroy them with It. I almost forgot my mission. My purpose. Now the vengeance is back. Stronger than before. I won’t forget again.

  I pull myself from the darkening thoughts. I need to concentrate on my survival right now. I can’t afford to get lost in my head. I stare at the newcomer and realize that in my daze I missed parts of the conversation Lori and the guard were having. I focus all of my attention of them.

  “…I can’t just let her free Lori, you know that. I want to help you, I do, but I will be the one punished when they find her gone tomorrow morning. Don’t ask this of me.” As I look closer, I realize the guard bears a faint resemblance to Lori. Same dark hair and same light eyes. He is much taller than she and has a sterner face. He’s too young to be her father, but might be her brother.

  “But Frank, she hasn’t done anything to deserve this sentence. You know that. I mean, look at the poor thing.” They both snap their heads in my direction simultaneously, and their eyes fill with identical pity. Definitely siblings. “She’s nothing more than skin and bones. Her wounds are open and still bleeding. She looks as if death will come for her in seconds. She came to our village for help and what did we do? We threw her in the cells and sentenced her to death for just trying to survive like the rest of us. Help her. Help me. Otherwise, you will have to live with the conscience of having a hand in killing this poor thing.”<
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  Frank looks to Lori once more, face softening marginally. Lori smiles sweetly and pulls him into a swift hug. “Thank you. Thank you. No one will know you helped us. I promise.” Lori mutters against his chest. I release the breath I hadn’t realized I was holding. I sway slightly on my feet and reach for the wall for balance. Frank steps back through the door with Lori following close behind. I grit my teeth and follow.

  I make it out the door to find that the lantern has been snuffed out. I assume it’s so we can make a break away in the shadows of the night. Makes sense I suppose, even though we won’t be able to see either. I spot Lori thirty paces out. She motions to me to hurry and I quicken me steps. As I near her side, she silently takes off behind the nearest building. Edging along the wall, we make our way past the first ring to the second. In no time, we have reached the outskirts of town. Lori breaks into the tree line and stops suddenly.

  I try to stop myself in time but don’t quite manage it. I lightly bump into the pack across Lori’s back. I hesitantly peek around her shoulder to see what the holdup is. She suddenly whirls around, her bag clipping my shoulder, causing me to stumble. I raise my arms over my head in a snap and flinch. After a slight pause, I glance up. She is once again watching me with those eyes full of pity. It angers me to see it. I don’t need pity.

  Unsure of her intentions, I keep my arms at my face just to be safe. She sighs softly and drops the bag to the ground as quietly as possible. She also reaches across to pull the bow and quiver free. She presents them to me in silence. Confused and hesitant, I slowly extend my arm. Prepared to pull back immediately, I grip the bread and retreat quickly. Next the bow and quiver are in my hands. I swiftly pull them over my back and secure the weapon. Next, she hands me the pack but I wait to put it on. I’m too weak right now to carry it long term; I’ll put it on when I’m ready to leave.

  She ruffles in her packet and pulls out some parchment. She opens it and thrusts it in my face. Startled, I pull back. She whispers so quietly I have to strain my ears to hear her words. “Take this map. I have marked where you are now and where Craforian is. At a decent pace, you should reach the town in about a week. Again, tell them I sent you, alright?”

  When I don’t respond, she continues on. “I also mapped where a nearby cave is so you can rest easy for the night. Don’t worry about anyone coming for you. You’re not worth the effort.” I cringe. Ouch. “There’s enough food for the trip in the pack, plus a little extra to help you regain your energy. There are basic camping supplies for you too. I took the liberty of providing you with a change of clothes and some medical supplies to hold you over until you reach Craforian. Good luck and don’t forget to tell them who sent you. I hope to see you again.” Without a moment’s pause, she disappears back into the village.

  Despite the less than civil things she said, I was going to thank her. After all, she did help me get out, even if only for her benefit. Well, too late for thanks now. I attempt to study the map in the darkness with no luck. Even with my eyes adjusted I can only make out vague shapes. I briefly search the outside of the pack, hoping for an attached light. Success. I carefully shoulder my back and click on the light. With a quick glance, I note my location and my destination. I head for the cave hidden in the dol forest and don’t glance back once.

  Chapter 5

  I finally found it.

  It had taken a little over two hours to make the hike to the cave. The pack and my wounds severely slowed me down. I flip on the small light and survey the cave that will be my home for the next couple days. The outside is inconspicuous, and had it not been marked on the map, I would have overlooked it completely. The only entrance appears to be the small cutaway of rock along the cliff face. Luckily, it’s a large enough hole to allow me and the pack to comfortably move through hunched over. I make my way inside.

  About twenty paces in, the entire cave expands to the size of a large meeting hall. The inside is much large than the entrance and could easily house thirty people. There is a small fire pit in the center of the area with a stack of wood to the left. There is also cloth to the far left along the wall and a bucket, with what appears to be water in it. My first order of action is to get the fire started.

  I set down the pack and grab a few chunks of wood from the stack. I lay them in the pit and discover a box of matches and flint to the side of the stack. I manage to get the fire going in a few short minutes. Soon, the cave is filled with warm firelight, and I switch off my flashlight to save the batteries.

  I rummage through the pack and lay everything across the floor carefully. Lori stocked the pack with a bunch of food and a water bladder. There are also more matches and flint. Just like she said, I find a change of clothes, two pairs of socks, and a pair of boots stuffed inside the pack. It’s a simple tan cotton shirt and a pair of worn cloth pants. Inside was also a warm blanket and a small cloth bundle. I slip the ties loose and peer inside the package. Bandages, cloth, and salve are safely nested inside.

  Deciding my wounds are a priority, I pull out the bandages and medicine. I slowly strip the remains of the rags off my exhausted body. After the painstaking process, I reach for the pail of water in the corner and a square of clean cloth. I move to the far side of the cave, hoping to contain the filth to one area. I should probably clean up outside but it’s not safe out on the open like that, naked and wounded as I am.

  After I bath and dress, I gingerly apply the salve to my wounds. I’ll have to apply the salve daily to ensure my wounds don’t fester, I’m surprised they haven’t already become infected. Once my wounds have been dressed, I look over my supplies. There is enough food for a week which I can extend if I’m conservative with my portions. With the bow, I now have another route for fresh meat, if my hunting is decent enough. Along with the food is a decent sized water bladder. Refilling it shouldn’t be a problem if I stick to the streams or rivers in the map I have.

  Having these supplies increases the likelihood of my survival out there. Allowing myself a couple days to heal in the cave also greatly improves my odds. For the first time in a long while, I at last feel somewhat optimistic about my future. I know that it won’t always go smoothly but at least I have a better chance than before. I just need to focus on getting stronger. Once everything is placed back into the pack, I lay down by the fire to sleep.

  There is only one of them left now. I hide behind a tree and cower as low as my body can go. My body shakes uncontrollably and my teeth clatter loudly in the silence. My nerves are fraying rapidly at the thought that I could get caught and dragged back, despite what They had said. While I don’t necessarily believe in the Gods anymore, I still pray they don’t find me. I’m not above trying anything to avoid my recapture. Anything but sacrificing others; I won’t stoop that low, even now.

  I peek around my hiding place as quietly as I’m able. I almost gasp at the sight of Him steadily making his way towards my tree. Whipping my head around, I clench my teeth together so tightly I can almost hear them crack. Please don’t find me. Please. Please. Keep moving. Go away. Go. Go. GO. Leave. Leave. This isn’t happening. I’m so close. A twig snaps right behind my tree and I flinch. I squeeze my eyes closed and hold my breath. Please. Please. Please. Oh my Gods. Go away. I can’t take this anymore. I want to go home. I just want to see my family again. Please. No. My eyes snap open at the familiar smooth, hypnotic voice that says, “Run Little Bhria. Run home now, you don’t want to be late. I won’t stop you, I give you my word.”

  I curl into myself and will my eyes closed once more. I grip my head with my hands. I don’t know how much time passes before I finally gather the courage to open my eyes and look upon Him. I jerk myself into a sitting position and shakily search all around me. He is gone and didn’t take me with him. It feels like I’m missing a piece of the puzzle, but my mind is too scattered to makes sense of anything. I can go home now.

  Tears flood down my cheeks. A tentative smile snakes its way across my face and I scramble to stand u
p, steadying myself against the tree that failed to hide me from the Monster. I can really go home. Hope blooms inside my chest. Before I can think to squash the emotion, it consumes me completely. I know hope can be a bad thing, but I tell myself it’s fine just this once. Everything is going to be alright now. He let me go. He didn’t stop me so I’m free. He doesn’t want me anymore. I’m finally going home.

  I stumble away from my tree and walk forward in an unsteady gait. I’m not sure if this is the direction that will lead me home, but at least I’m not headed the way I saw the Others go. Anywhere but where they went is good enough. I can maybe climb a tree and look for village that way. Maybe if I walk in this direction for a while I’ll be able to hear the village activity. I will figure it out. I will get home because He actually let me go. I’m really going home.

  I startle awake, sweat soaking my brow and tears staining my cheeks. It was just a dream. That’s all it is now, nothing more than a bad dream. I will my mind to go blank.

  With my dreams haunting me, my sleep is restless and I’m left just as tired as before. What I wouldn’t give for a dreamless night free of the taint from the past. But these dreams are my reminder; they are my punishment. I deserve worse. I deserve a worse punishment for my sins. Even knowing that, I am afraid of it actually getting worse. I’m not sure how much more I would be able to take.

  Thoughts turning grim, I push it aside and stretch my aching limbs as much as I am able without antagonizing my wounds.

  There is a bit of a chill in this cave, the fire nothing more than a few glowing embers. I add in fresh tinder and nurse the fire back to life. Once the shadows of the darkness are chased away, I lie down once more.

  *******

  Three days have passed since my arrival at the village, and I’ve spent two days in this cave. I quickly fell into a routine of eating, sleeping, and tending to my wounds. The near constant rest has helped my body, my wounds, and my mind. I feel much stronger and healthier. Not being as weak, my body is able to focus much of its attention to the healing process of my wounds. Most of the aches and pains have all but disappeared and the bleeding has stopped completely. Some of the shallower wounds have even healed completely. I guess it’s one perk of being more like Them. That thought fills me with bitterness. There’s nothing good about being like Them. I don’t want to be thankful for any changes They made. I don’t want to acknowledge any benefits to this situation. Nothing about what They did was ‘good.’ I shove all those thoughts away.